Saturday, February 15, 2014

February 14th

This dreaded day, also happens to be my favorite holiday.  I know exactly what you are thinking… WHY! is this most overrated, dramatic, and stupidly expensive holiday your favorite?  Because those three words describe me to a tee.  I mean a tee. 

But you really want to know why… because I LOVE LOVE.  Dugh.  But as a single girl it can be hard, but my day wasn't really that bad.  Most of the day, I spent day-dreaming and living vicariously through my married, engaged, and in-love counterparts on various social media outlets (social media is the perfect way to live vicariously through someone.  

Before you send me a message saying "you fell off the wagon!!!"… (in regards to my 6 months of romantic abstinence) I thought it would only be fair that I not exclude myself from the holiday altogether - but moreover I immerse myself in the holiday and practice self-control and MIND-control.  

One thing I really struggle with is being a FRIEND to guys.  I am constantly asking myself "is he the one" "could I see myself with him… what about him" "is he cute?" "Oh, I could work with that" DUMB DUMB DUMB!

Recently, I have been noticing that those questions are not what pops to my head.  Recently, I haven't cared.  Recently, I have just been able to be friends with guys.  It's amazing! How after only 50 days (almost) on this "cleanse" I am noticing a change.  

So yesterday was a test.  I was testing myself to see if I could watch a romantic comedy and not immediately go to my cell and text my sister and bash love or romance or wonder, why isn't that me.  

And guess what… I didn't!  In fact, I text one of my good friends and discussed the reality of a fairytale love.  Most of the Hallmark movies are based around women who are 28 or older.  None are 24 and trying to find a career.  Most are older, already several years in their career and living alone.  

Guess what… that is me in a couple of years.  Living alone and working hard in my career.  

It WILL happen to me. One day. And I can't wait. 

So Valentine's Day was great!  I still love love, but am working on waiting. :)


Oh, and no I will not be watching anymore rom coms!  I am going back to my Law and Order:SVU and NCIS reruns… but for the time being - I'm watching the OLYMPICS!!!! 

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